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On my way home, I was waiting for a train at a certain station. On the platform, a mother with an infant in a stroller was scolding a boy who appeared to be her eldest child, about 4 or 5 years old. From what I could overhear, she had asked him many times before leaving if he needed to use the bathroom, and he had insisted he was fine. However, right before they left the house, he suddenly needed to go, causing them to miss their planned train. This seemed to have ignited the mother's anger. She scolded the boy in a harsh tone, and the boy repeatedly apologized, saying "I'm sorry." After this went on for a while, the mother kicked the boy.

What should I have done? I kept thinking about it the whole time the mother was scolding the child, but no good solution came to mind. I felt that if I said to the child, "You won't do it again, right? You'll go to the bathroom next time," or if I said to the mother, "Your child is already reflecting on it, so please forgive him," it would only add fuel to the fire. I considered saying to the mother, "Raising children is hard, isn't it? It's amazing that you're raising two," but I worried I would be ignored as a creepy old lady. In that moment, I abandoned my moral responsibility as a third party.

The mother's actions appeared to exceed the bounds of discipline. I know nothing about the background of that parent and child. Perhaps the boy had repeated the same behavior many times and the mother had reached the end of her rope, or perhaps she is usually a very kind mother but was frustrated that day by a series of unpleasant events. Even so, kicking a child is not excusable.

How can we reduce the actual burden and the perceived burden of childcare for mothers? Increasing financial support and childcare services so that a mother does not have to handle parenting alone would likely be effective. Educational interventions that provide models for parenting might also be necessary. Childcare takes place within the home and is usually not visible to others. This is one of the major obstacles to transforming childcare practices. Nevertheless, I felt the need to explore ways for those of us around them to intervene when we witness incorrect parenting practices.

Praying in my heart that she would forgive him, I eventually parted ways with the parent and child without being able to do anything, partly because I was waiting for a train going to a different destination. I hoped that before the boy went to sleep that night, he would be held tight by his mother.